The Glutton’s Guide to Heavenly Tasting Pizzas
Howdy everyone ! In this week's blog edition, I'm listing out what I believe are some of the best practices and habits to adopt if your in for an heavenly pizza eating experience.
Whether it's a technique, a special ingredient or an attitude, I believe anyone will get something positive out of this article. Disclaimer, please do not be offended by some of my political stances on the art of pizza eating, please do not take my words as the gospel of a crusty god as I am merely an explorer in the realm of pizzas.
Take what I am saying with a flake of salt, with a hint of cheese, take a seat, take a slice, take a beer and sit tight. Enjoy yourself while i'm unravelling the dirtiest yet succulent secrets of my Glutton's Guide to heavenly tasting pizzas.
Eat With Your Hands
Throw out your fancy cutlery, throw out your forks & knives (not literally of course), ditch your sophisticated manners and use your bare hands because after extensive years of research in laboratories over the world, it has been undeniably proven by science that eating pizza with your hands increases it's taste by up to 20 000%.
According to Dr Blue Cheese PHD, "This dramatic increase in pleasurableness is in fact due to the physical contact between you and the slice where a sacred communion, a long lost connection reignite after milleniums of gastronomic evolution." The melting cheese, the rich sauce & spicy pepperoni is often referred as the "Holy Pizza Trifecta" amongst the scientific corpus and is seemingly at the origins for triggering dopamine neural pathways in subjects.
All jokes apart, I (writer of this article) believe that in 80% of cases eating pizza with your hands substantially increase how good my eating experience feels. You should try that out more often ! Furthermore, the "hand eating pizza technique" is a habit to develop & practice, it is a prerequisite for the next point which I call "the majestic dipping".
Dip Your Slices In Olive Oil AKA "Majestic Dipping"
Feel the grease, feel the explosion of flavours, the drips of oil slowly going down your hand & wrist as you devour this baby voraciously. In my book, there are few things more satisfying than dipping a chunk of pizza into high quality extra virgin olive oil a few seconds prior to eating it. Dip it in spicy oil and you are in for a an unforgettable tastebud euphoria.
Add Some Freshly Ground Pepper
I cannot overstate enough how important this is. Adding freshly ground black pepper on top of your pizza is a simple thing that makes all the difference when it comes to how enjoyable each of your bites are. This aspect can often be forgotten but I think it has one of the best return on investment.
What I like to do is to either ground the pepper on top of my slices or, If i'm feeling adventurous, I will ground the black pepper straight into my plate, dip my slice into olive oil then right into that pile of freshly ground black pepper. The oiliness helps the pepper stick to the pizza and each mouthful makes me shiver uncontrollably.
Don’t Put Too Many Ingredients
Have you ever ordered pizza from a local restaurant where they threw so many ingredients at once on it that each bite feels like a giant hairy man is just forcefully stuffing a pound of salted butter into your mouth ? You can feel the grease sliding down your throat and provoking gag reflexes each half second. What is supposed to be an elegantly crafted pizza crust is in fact a soggy sponge with the texture of overused play doh. Don't worry you are not alone, we've all been through it.
In my humble opinion, "Less is more" is a motto that applies perfectly to the art of pizza making. In order for a pizza to achieve the state of "wonder of the world", it's maker AKA pizzaiolo needs to ensure that it does not get carried away by the endless topping choices available to him/her. You want to hit the fine balance between simplicity, creativity & "flavourfullness". Always prioritize quality over quantity.
Fresh Herbs On Top
If you have fresh herbs around the house, near a window, in your backyard, somewhere in your garden then including some of it prior to cooking or as a finishing touch is a superb way of adding personality to your pizza. I always love to think as spices & herbs as "the soul" of a meal and this is a perfect example.
Put on your chef's hat, your apron, light up the fire and disappear in the luscious bushes of your backyard to come out with a fistful of fresh oregano, basil or aragula. Throw on a few leaves or sprigs on top the pizza before cooking or reserve it for later.
Firmly grab your 6 foot metal paddle with the confidence of Neanderthal spear hunter and slide it right under the pizza. Slowly approach it from the scorching fire and hear the sizzle. Pull back for a few seconds and in again, spin it left, spin it right just like Tango and pull it out of the oven, hot and steamy.
Drop the perfectly cooked pizza on the chopping board, take your finely chopped herbs and sprinkle them on top of the pizza with gracious flicks of the wrist. Watch your guests being mesmerized by your impressive virtuosity.
To Wrap Up...
Hope you enjoyed my quick Gluton's Guide To Heavenly Tasting Pizza, I sincerely hope that this piece of content inspired you on your path to becoming a legendary pizzaiolo.
Feel free to comment below if you have any comments or questions, we're always thrilled to assist !